Samstag, 20. März 2010

my health - my work - my life

This is for all of you who ask and care:

I'm not physically sick, but have been diagnosed with a disorder I've had my entire life. I was prescriped a medication; the symptoms of the disorder are mostly gone, but now I need to learn to deal with my feelings and sensations in a new way and unlearn all the coping strategies I've applied before that are not helpful anymore.

My colleagues and bosses can't or don't want to support me at work by providing a healthier surrounding for me so it's very hard for me to continue working there. They don't understand that with this new medication, suddenly my problems are very different from those I had before. It is indeed hard to understand, even for me. I have accepted the full-time position only because the alternative was being unemployed - my employer refused to let me work part time. I'll have to see how I'll be getting along now, after all, I'm able to filter sounds better now, concentrate more easily and not let every little thing - a phone ringing, a pencil dropping - bother me. Also, I'm not as exhausted after work as I used to be because it doesn't take so much strength to concentrate now. What I'm experiencing and feeling now isn't always easy, but it makes so much sense and feels right - it's good to finally know what is really wrong with me, and not be falsely diagnosed with depression or burn-out. I may go to a special clinic and learn my way around my new world. I might also find another job again, who knows?

(Excellent translation by: katimus. Isn't it good to have a daughter like this who really understands what's up with me? or to me? or about me? or over me? Oh I hate ...)

I noticed the tic-tac boxes with my mini-eyes yesterday and made some sidetables!


  1. please, get the google translater, I care about you and I want read this.

  2. hi dale, thanks for your care and I blogged the translation, hoping it is good enought to understand....

  3. Please accept my sincere good wishes for your ongoing health and well-being!
    It's so difficult to have a condition which affects your everyday life and work, as well as dealing with medication.
    Please take care of yourself, and enjoy your minis!!

  4. Hi Glenda, I'm of good cheer, really!
    I hope to be able to work as a hairdresser for handicapped or allergic or very sensitive persons in future, not only to make them good-looking, but sort of coach them. I did a kind of this work before, but because of my hearing-problems I quit even this job. Perhaps I'll have to establish my own business. But at the moment I need my office-job to save as much money as possible.
    And perhaps there is another solution for me, I had no idea now. The destination is to be amongst people who are good for me.
    I trust in life, that this will happen sooner or later.
    I'm so thankful for your care and good wishes, that means a lot to me.

  5. up with me :)
    destination ist eher ein echtes (geographisches) Ziel, an dem man tatsächlich ankommen kann, so wie das Ziel einer Reise. Ein Ziel im Leben, das man erreichen will, wäre ein "goal".
    ein Reiseziel erreichen = reach a destination
    ein gesetztes Lebensziel erreichen = achieve a goal in life

  6. Lovely colours in this room too, Oese! I have noticed tic-tac containers too - they come in such bright colours. I've wondered if it might be possible to cut them and build houses with them, but I haven't tried yet.
    Thank you for the English translation and the German lesson, Katimus! Prepositions are SOOOO difficult in another language! and the nuances of words like goal, destination, destiny ...

  7. Very nice posts these couple days. I enjoy looking at them so very much. I only wish you the best and thanks for sharing.

  8. Dear OESE
    Alles gutte ! Sei Stark Es wird besser mit der Zeit.

  9. Oese, you are such a good, honest soul and I am so happy that you are feeling better adjusted with the medication. It is too bad to hear about the lack of support for you at work...there is nothing worse! But, you have been putting your good energy into making lovely, creative scenes. Thanks for sharing and take care.

  10. Hi Rebecca, immediatly after reading your comment I tried to build a house with my two tic-tacs and some other stuff, but I wasn't happy with the result. Thanks for the inspiration!
    Amy and Neomig and Callsmall, thank you for your good wishes. I' such a lucky person to have such nice online-friends who care for me.
    I'm sure it'll turn out well for me and hopefully for all of us who are in trouble or stress or sickness.
    my best wishes and greetings!

  11. I'm so sorry to hear you still haven't got any support from your coworkers! I hope you soon will find another job where you can put your creativity and skills to better use and where you and your qualitites are more appreciated!

    I really like the colours in this scene, and great idea using the tic-tac container!

    By the way, I've heard the German Eurovision song now and really, really liked it! It didn't sound like a Eurovision song at all, and I think it will do very well, or at least it should!
    And many thanks to Katimus for the German lesson from me as well!

  12. Oese, thank you for sharing, I'm very glad you are feeling better. I wish your work was more supportive. I wish you all the best. Thank for all of the wonderful posts and inspiration!

  13. Hi Oese,
    Lovely scene I like the colours - lilac and blue in the furniture and picture.

    Sorry to hear that your colleagues are not supportive! I really hope it all works out well and will always wish you the best xx

    and thanks for sharing :-)

  14. Hi Pubdoll, good to hear you like "Satellite". I hope for this young girl that it turns out well for her. A few weeks ago she was only a pupil and now? I'm curios, if she will be on a good ranking or not. I like her outcome!
    Mini-Dork, thank you for your good wishes and for your inspiration. You are - like Callsmall and Rebecca - so good in the internet-research. That's not my cup of tea and I can profit by it.
    Thanks for that too.
    Natalie, thank you - with all this good wishes my work will be much better on monday, I'm sure.

  15. Liebe Petra

    Das meißte dazu hatte ich dir ja schon geschrieben :) Ich denke du gehst deinen Weg und wenn das bedeutet einen neuen Job zu suchen, wirst du auch das meistern. Ich wünsche dir bei allem was kommt viel Kraft und einen starken Willen!! Und ja es ist wunderbar einen Tochter zu haben die einen gut versteht und auch noch alles toll übersetzen kann!!

    Das Zimmerchen von Oma aus dem letzen Post hat mich auch sehr an das Wohnzimmer meiner Großeltern in Berlin erinnert - Danke dafür :)

    Das neue Zimmer oben hat tolle Farben... und sehe ich da einen Schaumfestigerdeckel als Lampenschirm... ;D

    LG, Nicola

  16. Prepositions in another language are easy if you can apply them without thinking - this can be achieved easily by reading books and watching movies and TV shows in the language one is learning. I don't have to think about how to say things in English anymore, only as much as I would think about wording something in German. I guess if I started to wonder about the whys and hows of the language and all its differences to German I'd be confused, too!

  17. My friend, I am so glad you are on the road to recovery. I just wish you had a better work environment that could understand what you are going through and be supportive. I do hope you will find a job that will be more satisfying to you in the future but in the meantime, hang in there. Keep using your creative talents on your miniatures to take you mind off of your work. I love that use of the tiktac box. Your eye for creative is great.

  18. I hope a rapid improvement in their disease, and work with a few more understanding bosses. A Carmen hug

  19. Hallo Nicola,
    Schaumfestiger, gut beobachtet. Konnte ich also nicht als Designerlampe unterjubeln. Und vielen lieben Dank für deine Wünsche, wird schon werden.

    Hi Doreen, yes I will hang in there - together with nearly all my workmates who would like to quit and have a better job, but it is not easy at the moment even for the young people, there are too many unemployed people.

    Dora, thanks a lot!